I Hate Social Media!

I really, really, really hate social network sites.  Myface, Faceoff, or whatever, I just dislike them to no end.  Why?  They are huge time wasters.  A couple people at work were so hooked on them that we had to configure the firewall to block them.  Folks were spending hours sneaking time in checking out their "friends" and playing something called Farm Wars.

And speaking of friends, if you are too lazy to write a letter (or even email) or simply pick up the phone to talk to them are they really your friends?  And if you just added them to your list as a friend and have never really talked to them aren't they more along the lines of perfect strangers than "friends".  What does friendship mean when you have 500 friends on a social media website?  Really?

I must admit I did sign up for one of these social websites a while back.  I was trying to help a nearby city win a contest to help feed the hungry.  They ended up getting second place.  In the few weeks I was on this thing I had a whole bunch of people try to add me as their "friend".  People I hardly knew or didn't even like constantly bombarded me with invitations to be their "friend".  I wouldn't let these people watch my dog overnight and they want to be my "friend".  People that wouldn't normally even talk to me wanted to add me to their meaningless list.  Boy that sure is flattering!

Then there is the nefarious uses of the social websites.  Folks getting in touch with that old flame from the days past.  Folks I got news for you, that old love of your's from high school didn't age well, is overweight, and there was a reason you broke up.  It wasn't going to work then and it's just going to mess your life up especially if either of you are married today to someone else.  People also lie on social media.  They lie a lot.  I have a relative who constantly lied about what was going on in their life just so they could hack off their ex spouse.  This person spent hours posting outright lies because they knew the other person was checking out their page.  I'm sure the ex spouse was doing the same thing.  Meanwhile the real relationships in life suffer because time is highly perishable and whatever time you waste on social network sites is time lost with your real friends and family that you live with, work with, and actually used to care about more than the 500 fake friends you've collected to help you battle on Mafia Farm.

While we are on the subject lets talk about Tweeting and Twittering.  There is no one in the world that I care enough about to want minute by minute updates about them delivered to my cell phone.  No one.  Short of Jesus Christ himself there is no one in the entire Universe, Multiverse, Underverse, or Microverse that I care about hearing from like that.  My life is full, rich, exciting, and busy enough that I don't want or need updates on anyone else's.  If you are into this junk start living your own life now.  Do you think the celebrity that tweets you all the time even cares a flip about you?  Just ask Congressman Weiner about how much he really cared about his real family after spending hours Tweeting people.

And let's talk further about video games.  I admit that I enjoy the occassional video game every few months but the biggest waste of time has got to be the segment of the market known as Sports Video Games.  Unless you live in Prudhoe Bay Alaska and can't go outside 10 months out of the year there is no reason to have these games.  If you want to play basketball then go outside and do it.  If you want to play football go outside and do it.  Ice hockey, join a league.  People spend hours and hours mastering button combinations when they could have learned to play a real sport and gotten some exercise too.  In the process of playing a sport for real they could have made some real friends.  People that live in the real world that are actually living their lives.  What a concept!

Which brings me to the fake music video games.  I know guys that have spent hours and hours day after day playing games with fake musical instruments.  Really, if they had spent a fraction of the time learning to play a real instrument then maybe, just maybe they could actually play something that was real.  Seriously, Loserville is your home town when you spend years of your life playing a fake musical instrument but can't get past "Chop Sticks" or "Hot Cross Buns" on a real instrument.  You put in the time practicing for nothing.  Even the guys who are good at Air Guitar make fun of you.  Paint the "L" on your forehead now or start living life.

And that's what it really comes down to, you need to live life.  It isn't making fake "friends" on Mywraith, Battling Trolls online with your fantasy Elfin team, catching a football from a digital version of Michael Vick, or playing a fake instrument with a fake version of Motley Crew.  Life is about really being in the action that matters and spending time with real people and real things.  So move out of your parents basement, get a job, bathe, and get a real relationship.  Otherwise just paint the big "L" on your forehead because you know that Darth Vader didn't spend hours "friending" people online.  He was too busy hunting down Jedi and bringing order to the universe.  He lived his life to the fullest and so should you!